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You find yourself in front a giant pile of old, sweaty shoes. A woman points to them and says, "Find the one that smells like candy."

Really? What kind of obstacle course is this? Well, you've already come this far...

After smelling way too many shoes that did NOT smell like strawberries, that disembodied voice gets into your head again.

So, I got all the candy I could buy and placed it in jars filled with worms and rotted meat. I taped a sign next to each jar that said things like “Candy sucks” and “Sweets are a lie.” Then I rented a warehouse to hold my exhibit and advertised it as “The one art show that makes you question everything you ever knew about everything.” I actually got quite a few people to come. Unfortunately, they took one look at my art and went into fits of laughter. It turns out candy isn’t controversial enough.

To really convince someone that your shock art is profound, you have to use something people hold dear. If I had used pictures of infants or Gandhi, I would have succeeded. Too bad I couldn’t try again, since now everyone knew I was a fraud. After that, I limited my artistic endeavors to doodling naughty smurf pictures on public restroom walls.

You ignore it and finally come across the one shoe that does smell like candy. It has a note inside. "What is the last name of the man who developed Odor-Eaters?"

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